Why talk about gossip again?

Dear Friends and Readers, Hail Mary!

Why talk about gossip again?

Gossip often behaves like an endless cycle, a kind of feedback loop kept alive by repetition and the constant human desire for information, whether true or not. When it seems the initial impact of gossip starts to fade, an almost automatic need arises to rekindle it, like a flame that cannot be extinguished.

This phenomenon does not occur by chance: gossip finds its strength in the vulnerability of others and in the fleeting pleasure of sharing something that puts us in the spotlight. However, what we may not realize is that this cycle not only perpetuates the initial damage but also amplifies its consequences. By bringing up the subject again, we want to reflect on the need to break this harmful chain.

Talking about gossip is talking about ourselves, about how we relate to others, and how we can, with awareness and empathy, transform a culture of exposure into a culture of respect. After all, breaking this cycle depends on daily choices and a more thoughtful look at the words we share.

THE PROBLEM
Gossip is a problem we encounter within the family, with neighbors, in the workplace, in our circle of friends, and even in religious environments (parishes and apostolates).

Often, we believe the problem lies only with the person spreading the gossip, but those who listen with pleasure also commit the same sin.

UNDERSTANDING
The eighth commandment forbids any offense against the honor of others and all falsehood.

Honor (a good reputation) is a highly esteemed good because it allows a person to acquire both temporal and eternal goods.

Therefore, it is advisable to gain and maintain a good reputation among others, which is achieved by performing good works even in front of others and defending one’s honor when it is unjustly tarnished.

We are also obliged to avoid anything that offends the reputation of others: suspicion and rash judgment, slander, defamation, insult, and favorable acceptance of murmurs against another’s honor.

Defamation consists of attributing faults to someone that they did not commit. When this accusation is made before an authority, it becomes a false accusation.

Those who take pleasure in listening to words that offend another’s honor commit the same sin as those who speak them.

Damaging someone’s honor is a greater sin the greater the harm caused.

Anyone who has harmed another's reputation is strictly obligated to repair it, whether by apologizing when done secretly or by making a retraction when done publicly. Those who refuse to repair the harm caused to another’s reputation cannot obtain forgiveness from God or absolution from a priest.

Those who judge others harshly will one day be judged severely by God. Judging others is an injustice against God because it interferes with His jurisdiction. Those who destroy another’s reputation are often severely punished by God in this life, falling into the disgrace they prepared for others. Those who habitually harm others’ reputations are on the path to eternal condemnation.

A TIP TO AVOID GOSSIP
A young man approached Socrates and said he needed to tell him something about someone.

Socrates raised his eyes from the book he was reading and asked:
– What you are about to tell me, has it passed through the three sieves?
– Three sieves? – asked the young man.
– Yes! The first sieve is TRUTH. Is what you want to tell me a fact? If you’ve only heard about it, it should die right here. Suppose it is true. It must then pass through the second sieve: KINDNESS. Is what you want to tell me something good? Does it help build up or tear down someone’s path or reputation? If what you want to say is true and good, it must still pass through the third sieve: NECESSITY. Is it necessary to say it? Does it solve something? Does it help the community? Can it improve the world?

Socrates concluded:
If it passes through the three sieves, tell it! Both I and you, and even your brother, will benefit. Otherwise, forget it and bury it all. It will be one less piece of gossip to poison the atmosphere and stir up discord among brothers and colleagues on this planet.

CONCLUSION
Gossip can be a grave sin.

Gossip, in technical terms, encompasses two sins: slander and murmuring.

Slander consists of revealing the sins and faults of others to harm their reputation. It may be that what is said about the other is not invented—which would then be calumny—but it is still a grave sin. St. Thomas Aquinas teaches that "to deprive someone of their reputation is very grave because reputation is the most precious of temporal goods, and without it, a person is incapable of performing many good deeds."

The Catechism of the Catholic Church states that "slander and calumny offend the virtues of justice and charity." Therefore, even if people commit mistakes and faults, we should cover them with a veil of charity, as the sons of Noah covered their father’s nakedness in the Old Testament (cf. Gn 9:23).

It is permissible, for a grave reason, to reveal someone’s faults. This is the case with politicians, who are subject to public scrutiny when their actions affect the common good or compromise the performance of the office they hold or will hold.

Murmuring, on the other hand, consists of revealing the sins and faults of others to destroy a friendship. For this reason, St. Thomas teaches that murmuring is much worse than slander since friendship is a much greater good than good reputation: "A friend is the most precious of external goods."

Therefore, whether to speak or remain silent, one must act with charity, "which is the bond of perfection" (Col 3:14).

Note: Our text is a compilation of several other texts.